Bingo!

Last night a group of friends and I went to play Bingo.  It was my first professional expierience with it.  I had no idea what to expect.

My first observation was, of course, the old fogies, then I saw all these ladies had their custom crocheted, quilted, or patch-worked “Bingo Bags”.   I only had my new green dabber and my water bottle; was I prepared enough?!  Some people had 10 dabbers!  What could you possibly do with all of those at once?!

Each game has a different pattern that you try to get.  The first was a regular Bingo.  5 boxes in a straight or diagonal line.  The first person yelped “Bingo!” so loud I almost fell out of my chair. The next game you had to do a palm tree pattern, which looked nothing like a palm tree.  I’m sitting there, dabbing away at all my numbers being called.  B15, Bingo!, another blue-haired lady shouted.  I only needed ONE more number!  O75! Then my friend looked at my card, and informed me that O75 had in fact been called already!  So I said “Bingo”… of course… not with the determination that people in the next county could hear me, but I still said it! Then I hear a group of hags say “It’s too late! No! No! It’s too late!” Too late?! Give me a break! Since we made friends right off the bat with an older gentleman host, he made his way over to me and took my card to confirm that I did have a legitimate Bingo. He took it up front to the announcer, who’s microphone was still on, and they were discussing on whether or not I called it too late. The rule is that you have to call Bingo before the next number is called.  They never said the next number, so I figured I was safe. The announcer said that he felt it was too late, and I wouldn’t be awarded the prize money, once he said that a white-trash, toothless lady sitting a couple tables over from us started clapping and laughing and shaking her head directly at me!  She was the only one doing this, mind you. Well, she didn’t know that our new friend, the older gentleman, actually convinced the announcer to award me 1/2 of the prize money. While this angry bitter hillbilly lady was giving my entire table dirty looks, and staring nonstop, I was handed 25 bucks! Then my friends started clapping and laughing at the lady who didn’t get her way. I waved that 25 bucks right in front of my face, smelled it, then slowly put it in my purse, all while smiling and showing her my full set of teeth.

Now I know what to expect for next time. Old ladies, in general, are pleasant to be around, but get them around their Bingo cards and dabbers, you’d better WATCH OUT! 

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